News from the Frozen Tundra and Nixing Anxiety

Photo by Luca Chiandoni on

This is NOT us, but it may as well be. You feel so cut off from the world, even with neighbors around, when you are iced in. It’s been a weird snow fall. It really hasn’t even been snow so much as just any icy pellet that looks like snow. So far our power has held. Not so for my daughter and her husband and the baby. I knew it in my heart when I awoke yesterday, that their power was going out. I prayed about it before I even knew for sure it happened. I prayed for their protection and warmth. Prayer warriors have been praying as well. I’m happy to say that they are with friends. They have someone with power that opened their home to them and fed them. I know Katy would not mind my sharing her words from her Instagram story (it’s public anyway).

So when I woke up this morning my mind and heart was filled with anxiety until I prayed and read God’s word and then looked to Instagram to see if anything new had popped up (a grandma does not want to wake a sleeping family at the 5 a.m. hour). So my heart has been made glad by her words and God’s words. His “be anxious for nothing” echoing in my mind. That wasn’t the passage I was reading, but I have hidden his words in my heart, as he as asked. I’m currently reading in Hebrews, in my adventures at reading the Bible backwards. I’ve already read it forward, now backwards. And yes, I’m still using my reading chair for prayer and scripture. I also think it will be a good spot for meditation, prayer, mid day too if I get lost or bewildered.

Not only have I give God the anxieties over worrying about Cody, Katy and the baby, but of any others that are in my heart and head. There are certain things that trigger your memories and bad experiences, and that leads to anxiety- anxiety for me mainly meaning (remembering, remembering what happened, remembering how it made me feel, how it upset me, how it changed my feelings, how it impacted me, how it still impacts me, makes me dread things, makes me feel negative feelings toward certain ones, makes me not love the snow, makes me angry that such a beautiful thing as snow can bring me anxiety, makes me doubt certain things, and wonder certain things, it makes me feel insecure, it makes me feel like I’ve done something wrong when I haven’t) and so……

I really have to give it to God when it snows and we get iced in. I keep thinking one day I won’t have to remember these ridiculous things. But I’m not anxious this morning because of my ability to stop those thought processes in their tracks and hand them over. Not only is God protecting Cody and Katy and River, but he’s protecting George and me, and He will deal with any of these situations should they reoccur, however as He will. And taking words from the Bible….Woe is the one that He deals with. I am working on my forgiving heart while He deals with those that I’m having to forgive. Over and Over. Every time it snows or we are in a similar situation as now.

The weather is weird all week with another system coming. It’s just NOT going to be a normal week. There are going to be things that just cannot be done. If it clears, I’ll likely be working this weekend to get it back in control. Whatever it takes. But it is going to require the patience of everyone. There ARE going to be things that will be late. We do not have all the things we need at home to do our jobs properly from here. We need to be safe. Safety first is what we preach all day, so we need to honor that. People will have no choice but to realize that we are in a situation that is not normal and all the normal things will not happen. But we will all do what is in our power safely to do. And that is all she wrote.

How are you doing? Is 2021 going any better? Are we going to leap from snow to tornadoes? We are living in a world that is spinning out of control for sure. We’ll all come out of it alive those that believe, in an eternal situation of life where there is no worry, no death, no tears. Cast your cares on the one and rest in Him during these times. His word is sharper than a two edge sword. I’m taking prayer requests today if you have them. Let’s not let our own anxieties or the anxieties of others control us, as they would like to do. But cast the cares on God who will handle it all as He Wills!

Have a wonderful and blessed day, whatever the circumstances! And may you have peace in your heart and be given a little piece of Spring, from wherever you can find it! LOL

Photo by Skylar Kang on

Valentine’s, Winter Storms, and Mom

Photo by Gabby K on

Happy Valentine’s Weekend! I’m happy to say that today after 10 our advisory is lifted and so we are able to go out and enjoy the day and keep our dinner reservations. I doubt my world will be filled with flowers and gifts, but with quality time and lots of fun. It feels good to be able to get out and go on one of our excursions, much like we used to. Could things be starting to get back to normal? I’m seeing and hearing some things that lean toward “yes”. But we are NOT there yet. We are GETTING there.

Had a great day yesterday. Got a lot caught up at work. I brought a monitor home from work and appreciate IT for meeting that request so quickly. I asked to borrow one for a time, to keep a set up here with COVID, weather, or other emergencies so that really all I have to bring here are files and laptop. Much much easier to deal with.

Two Winter Ice and Snow Storms Coming

So the National Weather Service and also the Weather Channel have warned that we have not ONE but TWO major snow/ice makers coming to our area. Sadly, as mentioned yesterday, it falls right into payroll days. But as mentioned, I offered to go in early and get it done tomorrow (even on Valentine’s Day) but the request was declined.

I try not worry over things. I prefer to think of it as wise planning to get something done that needs to be done instead of worry. But I’m labeled as a worrier by most everyone. It’s true I let my responsibility get the best of me in trying to meet them when it’s important. So yes, call it worry if one must. I definitely stew over things that I see that need to be done, to make sure they are, so if “worry” is the label for trying to be responsible and be a planner, I will take it. I DO hate that word though. I think it’s an unfair label at times for those trying to just get things done. I think the label is more for those that I worry about it. LOL LOL LOL! I think that is what it really is. I worry others too much about things that are important to get done.

It’s just responsible to plan and prepare in my opinion instead of react later, which I guess is how my education and past experience has shaped me to be. But it’s out of my hands now and we will take each day as it comes next week and do the best we can. I don’t feel comfortable being on unsafe roads in snow/ice and don’t want to get stranded from home either. So at least I can do some things from home and set up the office here. But how to do payroll from here. I have no idea w/o print capability. Let’s hope the forecasts ARE WRONG! But…I’ve tried to circumvent to no avail! What can you do but sit tight and hope for the best. That’s all my little worrier self can do at this point. I. HAVE. TRIED. God has it now. Nothing else I can offer but dealing with the hands that are dealt and decided.

We had a pleasant little evening last night. Sleep was ok. I woke up about 3 times on my own but at least did not get woken up by Roger or George snores on TOP of that.

Roger hung out with me last night while George was fixing a taco dinner for us. I was so tickled he wanted to be with me. He knows who leaves him treats to eat all day. We have dog beds almost in every room. HA. I put little treat bites on every bed across the house before I leave for work in the mornings. He finds them throughout the day. I don’t know if he goes on his “Easter egg hunting” all at once or if he just discovers them throughout the day. lol.

So I’ve ordered the other three storage containers from Amazon for my pantry. I ordered the OXO brand to see if I like them. I’m glad I saw them on Amazon because the ones I was going to order were not as big. But these will hold a lot of sugar or flour. I think up to a 5 lb bag and that is what I need. It comes with a scoop too. Kind of expensive but considering they are airtight I’m ok with that. I will use them for a long long time.

So tomorrow I’m also looking forward to as I’ll get some time to work on the iMac files along with the Lacie storage device. Then I can finally work on the videos again. Have been pondering the new version of the Intro! And also soon will hopefully get to work on some vlogging training videos with the camera. Always a list of things to do.

Mom, Thinking about Moving this Way

I talked with Mom last night and she is open to moving up here into a place of her own where we can take care of her, spend more time with her, get her to doc appointments and such. It will be a process. She is not quite ready to take the leap but wants us to start looking for places for seniors that might be a possibility up here near us. So we’ll do that. I told her what was in her favor was that I loved to pack and unpack, and set up! I can’t lift much but we can hire that out. You know I love a good project like moving. Most people dread it. Sometimes I think I want an RV just so I can “set it up”, LOL. Not really, though, as I love the travel and the blog/vlogging report out of it, and creating the memories, and the excitement of the “next stop”. But yeah, setting up of an RV would be a fun part of it for me. You see how often I’ve worked on my office!

Oh wow, I need to go get a shower so we can leave when expected. The advisory has been extended til Noon but George thinks we will be ok as the main roads are probably good. Some of the bridges and overpasses (likely residential areas) are icy this morning. So I hope he is right.

Have a great Valentine weekend! What are you doing for Valentines?

Icy Times, No Control

The morning had quite the slow start in many ways. I had absolutely zero energy to get out of bed yesterday morning – so basically I drug myself to the chair and sipped coffee. I began to come to life and began my morning slowly. I made myself shower and get dressed, although it was comfortable sweats and a warm shirt. And then made myself some breakfast. I opened the blinds across the house to be able to see the grey world outside, with it’s ice storm approaching nearby. We only had an advisory and with a few slick bridges and entrances and exits to the interstate. I was thankful I had a laptop and could stay home and didn’t have to drive in it. We were right on the line b/w ice and rain at 33 degrees most all day. There were some pretty bad wrecks across town and across the US with the worst being in Fort Worth. Thank goodness we were not in that, but we’ve been on those interstates many times and it’s scary even when the weather is sunny. I found my set up to be safe and secure and was so thankful to be home.

My office set up yesterday took a lot of effort, some of which I just did not have, but I finally got the monitor hooked up from George’s home office. It was a heavy son of a gun. I really need to have one here I can just leave in the spot. Thank goodness I already had the keyboard and mouse. But if George had worked from home yesterday, I’d have been w/o a decent monitor and my laptop is so small, I’m not sure I’d have been able to get much done.

Once I got it hooked up, my home internet went down. Geez. I had called IT b/c I didn’t realize it was our situation as I had been on the internet moments before to do my blog entry. But then I realized I could not access our server b/c our own internet was down. Once that came back up I could get in. I began answering emails. Of course the one day you are not in the office is the one day there are massive requests for w-2’s for those that moved and forgot to alert of their new address. Massive, well not really, but instead of the occasional one or two it was more like six or seven. Oh well, everyone has until what April 15th? So one more day to wait is fine since it’s February. I’ll tend to those this morning when I get there.

Other than that it was a quiet day email wise. I began entering the w-2’s I have to manually enter for Oklahoma since we don’t have the software or ability to meet their upload criteria. So I entered for an hour and a half and then something happened, I’m not sure what, it happened so fast. I think my fingers touched the touchpad on my laptop or something, the website disappeared that I was entering in. It was gone. Somehow I closed the website by mistake when my hand hit the touchpad and when I brought the website back up, my hour and a half of data entry was gone. I was only about a minute away from saving it. I was going to enter two more people.

I was so mad that this happened that I had to walk away for a few minutes. Sometimes it just seems that life fights everything and anything that you try to do. It was lunch time anyway. I wouldn’t have stopped at that point though as I’d had a late breakfast of egg and toast after my shower (which actually brought me to life), but I stopped and fixed pop corn as I was getting slightly hungry. I watched a YouTube show and it helped me to get away from the anger for a few minutes. I dreaded going back and trying to enter all the data again. The hardest part was entering all those over again that I had just entered. Once I got past that I felt like I’d made progress but otherwise it was just a wasted morning. I recalled how much I despise working from home when you only do it once in a blue moon. It’s more trouble than it’s worth. IF you did it every day you’d have all you needed and a proper set up for functionality. As awkward as it was, I did manage to get a bunch done in the afternoon. It’s a bit tedious so I stopped at 4:00. I think I got in about 60 or so.

Then I stopped and watched more shows, did laundry, and George came home. He went to the basement to paint some. He’s working on a room downstairs in the “storm cellar/storage area” in the basement to keep it from moisture and make it look nicer I guess and brighten it up. We called it the “spider room” before. You definitely want to look closely before you grab boxes in there.

Anyway around 6 p.m. while he did that I entered a few more w-2’s and then packed up my work area and took George’s monitor back to his desk and rehooked it back up. It was my day to cook dinner as I had a recipe to fix that was quite different, but it was quick.

I sautéed onion in a deep skillet, added ground beef. I mixed up mustard and molasses (yep you heard right) in a bowl. I added a can of tomatoes to the ground beef and onions as it cooked on the stove, then I added in the mustard and molasses mixture. And added a cup of rice, that was uncooked. And let it simmer on low heat for about 30 minutes. You have to test taste to make sure rice was done. It needed about another 8 minutes. I probably turned it down lower than it was supposed to but as the liquid left the dish I was afraid it would scorch. I probably opened the lid too many times, and interrupted the steam process but I was NOT going to let it stick. It turned out pretty good. I like that idea of throwing things in a pan and adding a cup of rice and letting it simmer for a one pot meal. We can do that with other variations for burger meals. Not bad at all. As George says “I don’t go back for 3rd’s for something I don’t like”. I had accused him of not liking it as he doused it with hot sauce but he does that with everything.

We began watching Brigerton on Netflix last night. It was just ok. I guess I’m not enthralled with the characters so much. Perhaps it will be propelling a bit later but for now, I think I’m just tolerating it. Have you seen it? What are you watching that you enjoy? We are finished with Yellowstone and also Virgin River. All were very good.

I made my bed yesterday since I was having to look at it all day. This is where I’ve been sleeping quite successfully and I am happy with that decision to sleep here. It’s helping me to get more sleep away from the Roger scenario and the loud George snores. I also am not waking them up when I get up which is about once a night now instead of two or three now that they are not waking me up. No one slept in that scenario.

I have to use this room for my work office since the blue internet cord (ethernet) seems to provide a better set up. Otherwise the internet is in and out a lot it seems when connecting via VPN. It was in/out anyway as it was. Plus it’s better to have a separate work spot b/c otherwise I’d be interrupted with personal notifications and such from my own office and I’d be longing to do other things. I’m disciplined enough not to succumb but I would still be longing to do other things.

So all in all not an unproductive day but not as productive as if I had been at work. The ice system actually petered out as it hit our area and other than a few icy spots most roads were ok. But for most of the morning it had threatened our area and the news team had said it was going to hit Mt Juliet. But it never really got bad here other than a few icy areas on bridges/exits to interstates. It did just to our north. I was just thankful I made the decision not to be in it. I’d have been on the radar all day wondering if I needed to go home yet. At least I had peace by being at home. Then I could worry over w-2’s instead, LOL.

So my tiredness went away and energy returned somewhat after I had that egg on toast. I felt better as the day approached that I was not getting or did not have “the dreaded”. I think my body was just worn out as it usually does from all that we have done and tried to do since the holidays. I have always pushed through the busy-ness of it and once the busy-ness calmed, my body crashed. I think that is what it has tried to do this week. I’ve been tired all week but yesterday was a different tired. I hit a brick wall.

I felt a little tired when I got up today but not like yesterday. I think my consoling factor is that tomorrow is Saturday. Now we have to decided if we are going to do our Valentine’s celebration. As little as we have ice/snow here, it is making me mad that it has to mess up work and also plans to get out and do something. But I’m trying to be patient. I mean what else can you do? It is supposed to be icy tomorrow and when you see 133 car pile ups in TX, you realize you don’t need to be out in it. I mean most people in Nashville cannot drive appropriately in sunny weather. So I hate to go across town even in rain much less ice/snow events. So we’ll look at the weather but considering cancelling and going on a better day.

I’ve also tried to circumvent the snow storm coming this Sunday night into Tuesday. I had offered to go in Sunday and do payroll. But we would have had to have everyone prep early for that. My bosses said not to worry about it that it would be ok and told me not to come in Sunday. So there’s that. I won’t be there Sunday and I’m glad NOW because it’s going to be really cold Sunday and I’d rather have my day off anyway. That decision made and now what’s left is to hope that Sunday through Tuesday’s snow storm does not bring the 1-3 inches as expected, b/c I don’t and won’t drive in snow unless the road is entirely clear. I don’t do rut driving either in snow.

I offered to get her done so there would be no worries but it was declined and so now it’s up to the weather and God. And will be what it will be. And hopefully payroll won’t be late. Used to be George would get me there, but now he does not go in that direction, we also have difficulty getting out of our neighborhood now that we live here with the hilly streets, and I think his views of driving in the snow at this point have changed a bit. Not worth messing up cars or getting killed yourself b/c you can’t control others or even icy situations sometimes. So if it snows, I’m pretty stuck here and won’t be heading out in it. And if I’m at work and it starts snowing, I will pack up and go home and endure any ugly fallout from it. So wish us all luck. Safety first right?

And that is all she wrote for today. I think we have black ice possibilities out there today so I’m taking my time and letting others beat the roads down before I head out. I’m considering taking side roads which will no doubt take longer but it will be slower and safer I think than the interstate. I’m definitely not leaving til the sun comes up good. If there is even going to be sun. I doubt it. We live in a grey world right now.

I guess we will get through this period of time and one day spring will come. I had asked for some warm weather but God has chosen to send frozen precipt instead. It’s his timing, not mine. I have bathed the payroll situation in his hands for next week. I wish he’d move the dates of the storm. I’ve offered to get it done in advance of the storm. I’ve done what I can to help control the situation. It would not be successful to do from home since I don’t have a printer set up and there are places where you don’t have a choice to print to PDF. So anyway, I’m trying not to worry about it. It’s out of my hands. I just try to plan in advance to get rid of barriers and control it so things happen on time but now it’s all out of my hands since my offer was declined, so may prayers and a bit of luck be with all. We’ll see what happens.