Birthday Vlog, New Year Mindset, Ignoring the Negativity

January 13, 2024 /

Somehow I was able to get this video done this week. You can watch it here. 

The antibiotics are working I think. Still having some pain but not much. I got the 2nd extension of my antibiotics yesterday. 

Got us to our nails appointment after work on Wednesday, and a full on grocery run for Mom, and a few things for myself that I thought I could eat at work. Got Mom a drive thru hamburger and although I could only drink liquids, she was over there munching on fries and offering me some. Got her groceries unloaded. Got home by bedtime but it takes an hour to get ready for bed and unwind, talk to George, etc. So late to bed. lol. 

I was telling her I had to work Sunday b/c of the impending snow storm to get payroll done. But George said he would be going to church and could take her. I told her it was life group day. She made some noice like bah humbug and huffed and said she would just not go to church then but that someone needed to come take her tree down as she was tired of looking at it. 

My feelings got hurt because I have been sick with the flu, tried to enjoy a birthday week night, had diverticulitis, my own doc appt, and got her to her hair appt, and to nail appointment, and to get groceries twice, worked FT and mostly all of that with a fever off an on since Christmas. I really would have loved to have seen some understanding and some patience. Instead of constantly pushing about the darn tree. I told her the tree was the least of everyone’s concerns because if I have to have colon surgery, she’s really going to be in a mess unless George is willing to step in or she makes up with my sister. But NO what matters to her trumps anything I am going through. Clearly proven here. 

I said on Facebook that I felt like I’d failed her by not getting the tree done in addition to all that. And well. She posted a bunch of weird comments on my post about how she took care of me as a child and let me drive her car (to work) at nights and it was what a burden it was. I did not reply to obvious narcissistic responsive posts. I just let it be.

Thursday got her to her hair appt and back home again. She didn’t want anything through a drive through. She wanted to be home and out of my “hair” she said.

I got phone calls and texts from others quizzing me about Mom’s behavior. That took some of my Friday night but somehow George and I managed to get our groceries done, dinner ate, and I got my thumbnail done and scheduled the video.

This week was mainly a good week though. All you can do is try to turn it around and look at the positive things. 

  1. I’ve decided that even if the colon doesn’t hold and if I have to have surgery that it’s ok. Even if I have to skirt the edges of death, it’s really been a fairly good life for a good chunk of it. I’d swap some of it off if I could but it’s ok as the next life will be far better.
  2. It is possible to survive said surgery if I have to have it – so there’s that.
  3. I would finally get to rest – either in bed or in heaven.
  4. I won’t have to deal with drama and narcissistic behavior
  5. Retirement is coming in a year, if I’m not off of work before then due to above.
  6. I had a great birthday – family was so good to me. All of them. I love my pajamas. I may even do like a whole blog on pajamas. The materials they are made of. What I have I’d never have bought myself but others had them and knew I’d like them. I’m enjoying my sleep in them.
  7. I’ve been able to work through all this mess even with a fever. 
  8. I have an off day today and Monday! But I do payroll tomorrow.
  9. I have a new grandson coming and a trip to TX coming soon. I get to be on the ranch too and stare out at wide open spaces, drink coffee, and play computer games, and think about maybe getting to move to TX.

I slept in this morning and got up late to promote the video, but it’s ok. I needed the sleep. Here it is again WATCH HERE, thanks for reading and watching. Love you guys. 

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23 Comments

  • monamorgan

    January 13, 2024 at 10:45 am Reply

    I’m afraid my comment on your facebook post might have set your mom off. I’m so sorry about that. I really wanted to reply to her when she put on that comment about how she raised you, took care of her parents etc without complaint and tell her “Bless your heart” but I restrained myself as I was afraid that might send her over the edge. lol

    • LessHustleMoreCoffee

      January 13, 2024 at 11:15 am Reply

      I sent you a message on Messenger but not sure you got it. It’s best not to respond to narcissistic negativity. You can’t win. They are never wrong, and everyone else is. They usually cannot empathize in any way or see the big picture. Otherwise they would feel great sorrow and shame as to how they treat others and would have to look at selfishness straight in the face. Their psyche won’t let them unless they are willing to do the hard work to improve. It’s been that way for the 61 years I’ve been around and not likely to change. So I’m glad you didn’t. It’s never ending but luckily some peace in between episodes. I’m about done though due to health problems. It’s getting hard for me to be there for her anymore. I can barely function with work, these fevers and diverticulitis episodes that send me to bed. The last thing I want to do is answer to my mother why her tree is not down so she doesn’t have to look at it. Ummm flu, can’t pass food in my colon. I’m just really shocked even though I know better. So no worries. I know you were looking out for me and I’ve actually said what you said and worse to George and even God. I hope God forgives cursing in prayers because he’s heard a mouthful of tattle prayers in last two years.

  • monamorgan

    January 13, 2024 at 11:21 am Reply

    Also, I’m really praying you don’t have to have the colon surgery, but it’s amazing what modern medicine can do. I know it’s scary but they’ve come so far with these things. My sister’s entire upper digestive system was surgically altered – a new esophagus made from her stomach and all kinds of weird things – and all done robotically through tiny little incisions. Took 15 hours but she came through with flying colors. I know colon surgery is different but it’s just amazing what they can do. Prayers that it doesn’t come to that though!

  • Catsandcoffee

    January 13, 2024 at 12:28 pm Reply

    Well, I am glad your Birthday was decent at least and you got spoiled with good gifts. Prayers on the possible surgery and on the Mom relationship. Been there.
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  • sybil wilson

    January 13, 2024 at 1:56 pm Reply

    As always a great vlog. I start with a smile every time when you open the cupboard door !! Thank you for sharing your birthday with us. You’re so lucky to have had so many wonderful presents.
    I don’t think I will be so lucky tomorrow …in fact truth be told I’m a wee bit disappointed I’ve only had three cards so far….i thought the post would have brought some today…instead I don’t think he even came !! Ah well maybe more on Monday. I’m pleased to see that you looked a bit better this week so keeping you in our prayers is working I’m sure. Take care this week, although it’s going to be a busy one try to find some bright minutes. Night night from a bitterly cold BOX.

  • Anonymous

    January 14, 2024 at 4:09 pm Reply

    I am glad to hear you are some better. I know it is stressful feeling bad and not being able to eat what you enjoy.
    Your birthday looks like you had a good one. I love pretty soft pjs too.

  • Ginger

    January 15, 2024 at 6:19 pm Reply

    It’s Monday evening, and I just wanted to pop in and say I hope y’all are staying warm and enjoying the beauty of the rare snow from inside not out in it! My Tennessee family has been sending pics and tales, and the kids are so excited. Take care!

    • LessHustleMoreCoffee

      January 15, 2024 at 7:07 pm Reply

      Hi Ginger! Yes we are home and possibly for a few days. I won’t get out until I’m comfortable that I can safely drive without ice and snow on the roads. My backroads are rough. It’s so pretty and so much snow! God is giving us a beautiful rest. I work from home tomorrow. Hope to leave a blog entry tomorrow with pics.

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