Look who stopped by in the back yard for a visit yesterday afternoon. Please ignore George’s famous “burn barrel”, ruining backyard photos since 2008. lol
So I’ve been listening to Gary Chapman’s book on the 5 Love Languages. The way we give and like to receive love. I’m almost finished with the book.
The love languages are:
Words of Affirmation
Acts of Service
I figured that mine was “Words of Affirmation” but I had not considered that it could be a combo deal. But after taking a quiz on line a few weeks back, and after listening to the audio book, I realize I’m a combo of Words of Affirmation and Quality Time.
I’ve been trying to determine what George’s is. I’m pretty sure it’s Quality Time. If there is ever a complaint he has of me- it’s usually that I have ignored him or not spent enough time with him – not always – he has more complaints trust me – but that one was a theme a lot through the years as I tried to balance career, marriage, motherhood and still be me. He may be a Combo too but I’m not sure. I’d say Acts of Service would be the other one if he is a combo. He’ll do anything for you, if you ask. Maybe not if you tell him to. lol
So one way you can figure out what your love language is (or are) is to list what determines a meaningful marriage to you. I did this exercise recently just to confirm and here was my list. It is not all inclusive but it was the first few thoughts that came to mind:
- Open Communication
- Respect for one another’s opinions
- Care/Concern for one another’s well being
- Respect/support for one another’s goals
- Spending time together
- Discussing/Planning future goals together
- Creating things together (a meal, a project, a trip)
- Encouragement of one another
- Help one another
- Know and Understand that you are loved
Based on these things, it’s clear that Words of Affirmation are important to me as well as Quality time. It doesn’t mean that we don’t care about the other Love Languages. They are all important. But the speaking of the proper love language to a spouse can make or break a marriage, according to Dr. Chapman. If you can figure out your spouse’s love language and start speaking it and they figure out yours – it can be a wonderful thing.
And that is about all I have time for today. It’s payroll closing day!
Gotta head out the door. But I’m curious if you all have ever heard of The Five Love Languages and what do you think yours is? Your spouses? This has been a good eye opener for me.