Yeah so how was your weekend? I had to look back to see where I left off. At 60, it’s getting more difficult to skip blogging days and then remember what happened more than a day ago.
Friday I took a PTO day to take Mom to Columbia in a moderate rainfall the whole way, because, you know, “I never do anything for her.” And we went to her bank to close out her lock box. There was only two house papers and a few silver coins, buffalo nickels, and wheat pennies. When we got down there I realized my sister was on the account. We probably could have had her close it out. But anyway, Mom needed to see what was in there and she got to have lunch with a friend.
After that we went to meet my sister who was at the Cancer Center and had just had radiation and was waiting for her PICC Line to be readjusted as it was hurting her. It had been since Ella’s graduation since she and Mom have talked. I’m not sure how many years it’s been but Mom had not seen the kids grow up in their teen years anyway. My sister gave up on the relationship after deciding she could not deal with it anymore. This of course, leaves me holding the bag, to deal with it. But I am at least grateful the two can talk as distant acquaintances, if nothing else.
I will say that my own relationship with Mom is in a horrible state and I too am not sure that when we are together that I can talk anymore. The last year or so has just done a number on me that I can’t undo. I’m really just there to see to her needs, keep the arguments to the minimum, and try and meet God’s asking of me. I’m teetering on the considerations of the three strikes you are out boundary, but I know the three strikes will come in a matter of just a few months.
Saturday morning we went to the local Farmer’s Market. I was able to cross that off the bucket list. My body was craving fresh veggies as I’d had all the starches I could eat. I have not even been able to eat all my dinner there was so much starch the night before. We were just out of fresh goods, trying to save money at the store I guess.
I ate the knockwursts Friday night but had to forego the spatzle. I cannot eat starches like that as it’s just too much. George and I both agreed the spatzle was not good anyway. I didn’t admit it til the next day when he said something about it. I didn’t want to hurt his feelings. It was out of a box anyway and not homemade but the starches make me not feel good. Plus it takes me a week to physically get over a row with Mom. I can mentally do pretty good with it now but physically – the initial fright or flight reaction, and PTSD that triggers, does a number on my nerves and is harder to get over. Add starches to the mix and I am stiff, tired, and lethargic.
So since I’m always thinking about Mom, even though I do nothing for her. Sorry my sarcasm is how I deal with life sometimes. When we got to the farmer’s market, my trying to please and make her happy kicked in. I called and said “hey you want some fresh veggies?” And of course she did, so I had some $ and used my money to buy it and then didn’t have any to buy our own. George had some but not enough. So he had to go to the bank. I wasn’t thinking. And it’s more expensive than ever. It’s not cheap going there anymore.
I really feel like a fish out of the water at these. It’s just so awkward. Everyone else seems to be just going about the business of getting veggies and paying for them. I on the other hand am staring and asking questions – where do you a get a bag? Who do you pay? It just bothers me that you can’t do all the shopping, then pay, and why are the bags put away where you can’t reach them? But I guess they want to monitor who is taking a bag so they can pay. Anyway it was confusing and I get embarrassed that I’m so awkward with the process. It’s more spread out at the one in Nashville and you scope it out ahead of time and you can tell who owns who. This one is little, jammed together and honestly the last three times I’ve been there I felt out of place. Parking is crowded and is an issue also, but at least rotates quickly in and out. I will never go by myself – that’s for sure.
Afterwards we went to Houston’s (butcher shop and market). I was going to buy the small pimento and cheese because it’s overly expensive. However, George said get the big one. It is homemade and it is very good. We bought chicken as they are pretty good on their chicken prices. However, I was disappointed to see that the beef was pricey. I used to feel like their prices were competitive, and cheaper, while also still having good quality of meats. But the prices were steep yesterday and no longer considered to be a deal in my book. I’m still fond of them but we rarely go in there anyway, because we usually get our groceries where we are taking Mom and/or are needing to get our frozen goods. I can’t frozen goods usually when taking Mom – in the summer anyway. But I did enjoy our trip to Houston’s even if we didn’t buy much.
Then we went to the regular store and bought our normal groceries. Houston’s is just not that big. But before all that we went to a few yard sales. All in all I enjoyed our time out, but was kinda freaking out a bit that we were gone all morning when I only imagined a quick trip to the farmers market and the store.
I did a lot of cleaning Saturday and laundry, including two sets of sheets. It was a busy day. I also vacuumed the laminate flooring parts of the house. The carpet areas will have to be next week. I refreshed my bathroom, cleaned all the electronic items (TV’s, TV stands and all the tables or surfaces that you can’t use oil on). I rehung my kitchen curtains from being washed two weeks ago. Actually George did it and I supervised. I also enjoyed a gluten free beer. And it wasn’t even 5 p.m.
I made an Orzo Salad in the afternoon for us to eat off of. It’s so good. I will share the recipe later in the week. George made a lemon chicken dish that was pretty good.
And then we watched Beverly Hills Chihuahua. Because of Maddie. lol It was cute.
She and Dexter watched it. lol
I cleaned the dog center. Yes this is after it was cleaned. It was a mess! But this is the best I can do for now.
George and I did the divide and conquer method for Sunday. He took care of Mom’s grocery trip so I could come home and get things done. I finished laundry and ironing, made a squash casserole, and worked on Mom’s finances.
I’m a little concerned that her spending/expenses outweigh her income by an average of $600+ a month. Every month since I’ve done the finances she has had to put over $300 a couple of times a month. I guess she will have to get into investments when the savings is gone. I’m thinking 3-6 months the savings will be depleted. We can’t help much because our own expenses are tight now that the economy tanked and our salaries don’t increase to match. When you mention it to Mom she denies it and says she doesn’t have much to pay. It adds up and the shopping purchases plays a big role. But in doing her finances, I need to discuss it with her again and I dread it. But I can show her the numbers. If she can see it.
We had a pretty good dinner last night. I made squash casserole. A different one. I will share that too.
I was disappointed I did not get further down my list. But I just moved everything forward, AGAIN!
Oh, I also got George’s birthday gifts wrapped while he was gone.
Gotta go! See ya mid week with the Orzo Pasta Salad recipe!