Sadness, Moving Things Around, and Decorating for Christmas

My bedroom is back together and the cat is back in his weekend winter spot. I had been missing Maisy and Roger yesterday as they would lay and watch us decorate and flit about the house. It just especially hit me yesterday. My shoe rack is back together and no longer in two baskets of piles where I couldn’t find anything. Now I need to locate my other winter things downstairs that includes my scarves so I can put them out in the basket on top of the shoes. I’ve missed them last week. I could have used them on those 20 degree mornings we had.

I now have two drawers of pajamas! I can fit them all in. Not shown is the 1st drawer. I have more winter PJ’s coming – likely in the same tub as the scarves. I have to locate them in the basement storage unless George brought them up already. They may be in the kitchen. There’s a tub of clothes in there. But I had to stop working on clothes to get the Christmas done. I’m only about half way through considering the tree is not done yet. It seems we are always having to buy a string of lights. The middle section of the tree never wants to work on any prelit tree we seem to have. So we have to buy more and it’ll have to be today because I need to get the tree done today. We go back to work tomorrow.

My sock drawer is back, complete with section of Christmas socks and one bathing suit in case we go to a heated pool or hot tub in the winter time. It’s rare but possible.

I listened to Christmas Cafe Jazz on YouTube- just a pretty scene filled with beautiful Christmas music. I listened while decorating and moving stuff around.

Mid-day we took Mom some Turkey and Dressing and other leftovers and the rest of her clothes. George had to check a fuse. A fuse had “tripped” or whatever that meant on one side of her cabinets. I don’t know what would make that happen. But I guess it was an easy reset.

She wanted us to put her clothes we took over on her bed. She was going to put them up later in the day. It took us about 5 trips with the two of us to bring them all in. We had two complete car loads again. I think there are a few more things downstairs but mainly yard critters, some videos, and we’ll just have to go through and move things around as we straighten the basement and make sure we took everything over.

I had tears while putting up Christmas. Just so many emotions. First, I miss the love of my Maisy dog who loved me unconditionally. I am also upset that I couldn’t get Mom’s house put together more for her with the time we had the past few weeks. It was just the weirdest move ever. The boxes went in before the furniture making it very difficult to unpack. I had thought the last out items from the old house would be the first in. If we had done it that way it would have been easier on the unpackers (mainly me). But it was first out (all the unneeded items) and first in to the new house which meant we were accessing and unpacking a lot of boxes that were not needed. There are so many boxes and so many of the needed boxes have been on the bottom or where we can’t get to them and many of them heavy. George moved boxes around two or three times trying to find things. We still don’t have her TV hooked up and can’t find the remotes.

Since Mom can’t do much, everything totally falls upon us. I saw a Facebook post yesterday indicating she had made a mistake by moving. I think that is because so many things are still in boxes and she has downsized (well the space has) but her things have not much other than furniture. But with her statement on Facebook It makes those of us who have worked so hard to please her, feel bad. However, she didn’t have anyone to take care of her in Columbia as she and my sister quarreled and had a falling out and my sister has set a boundary with her to never see her again. So she gets no care from that side of the family. Mom would not hear of assisted living as an option, which I can see now would have been the best of options seeing that she is winded just getting up out of the chair and moving three feet. But it is what it is. There are just some facts that can’t change. And a big one is that it was her decision and we have all worked hard to make it come true. It’s a beautiful place and once we get the place together it’ll be recognized, one can hope. But there are only three of us trying to work on it and Mom can’t do much, and now I am paying for it with being out of line and I am having to quit lifting so much. Although I don’t seem to be doing a good job of it. Last night I was in so much pain with my rotator cuff and back that I had to take Tylenol and put a heating pad on my neck. Jaw still not right and will go to doc when we are back from our trip. I just don’t have time this week. I can open my mouth wide now but there is this one section of my jaw that is hung and will not open up.

There are a few facts that cannot be changed.

  1. We can’t and won’t be there 24/7. We are trying to accommodate the best we can. But we don’t and can’t give 100% of our time.The move details are going to take a while to sort out. We knew it wasn’t going to be overnight.
  2. It took several weeks to move out of her old house. It’s the same moving in and setting up.
  3. It takes patience and resolve – which are things both Mom and I – I get it honest – are not very good at. We want it and we want it fixed right now.
  4. She knows where she wants things. I don’t. When I try to ask where things go she doesn’t know yet. I get it. Somethings she just has to figure out.
  5. The most important thing to remember is that: This was her decision.

I think George is going over there for a few things today. After sleeping I can’t remember what for, but maybe something for the TV or the rails. Not even sure. My mind is all over the place. But she has some mail and a flash light and some things he is taking over today. He suggested I stay here at the house and do what I need to get done being that today is our last day to get Christmas up and my winter clothes out and finish our laundry.

We also have to pack for our trip that we go on later in the week. Also Lowe’s has not called about the dishwasher we just had to buy and paid for install. It’s been two days. But I understand it’s been a holiday weekend and all and things are not normal. I figure they will call on Monday.

Mom was nice to buy a tank of gas for me yesterday. I had to stop and get gas. It does not take long for the gas to go when I’m driving to Nashville every day and then several trips to Lebanon in the other direction. So I appreciated that. She has taken us out to eat numerous times too in the last month and I appreciate that.

So today’s agenda:

  • Finish Putting Christmas out
  • Obtain Christmas lights and get that figured out. (I hate having to add the lights. I hate that part with a passion. And it makes me in a horrible mood.). Mood gets better when putting the ornaments on.
  • Moving my summer clothes over from the coat closet to the office closet
  • Moving the coats back up to the coat closet
  • Looking at this week’s to do list
  • Redoing my vitamins for the week
  • Putting a few things on the iPhone to do list
  • Changing George’s sheets – bless his heart I think it’s been 3 weeks.
  • Find my winter clothes container
  • Begin packing for trip – no more off days til then
  • Wash dishes
  • Fix eggs for breakfast
  • Wash 2 to 3 more loads of clothes
  • Vacuum
  • Watch a show mid-day with pop corn when I get tired
  • Might stop for an hour late afternoon and work on the iMovie and drink coffee when my back starts to hurt and my energy wanes.
  • I’m sure there’s more stuff but I am not sure what it is.

I did some Christmas shopping at 1:30 a.m. night before last – it’s kinda the only time I have had. I have asked God to help me and I think he wakes me mid morning to shop. lol. Mom also needs some things to be ordered. Once the move started it has been hard for us to sit down together and do it. She said she would try to send me the link. Or at least a picture.

I got a full night’s sleep last night of 8.5 hours. That was nice. I am a little stiff this morning but at least not in pain. The icy hot also was a quick remedy.

The alerts seem to be working for some of you and I have one person saying theirs is not working via email. It’s the strangest thing. I wonder if it is sending to trash or junk? Maybe it’s a sign, lol! It will need to be on the safe list. I need to sign up for my own blog with another email address and see if that works for me, lol, so I know if I get it or if I don’t.

So I’m off to it this morning. This big long list. What all are you doing today?

10 responses to “Sadness, Moving Things Around, and Decorating for Christmas”

  1. You have worked really hard trying to take the best care of your mom that you can. Now that she is in her place, things will start to fall in place bit by bit. Perhaps she made that Facebook comment when she was tired. Things always seem hard or not right when we are tired. Enjoy your Sunday, and take care of yourself.

  2. My sister moved to her own apartment about a year ago, she’s 66 and had been living with her daughter for over the last 10 years to help with the kids as her daughter was a single parent. She totally wanted this. Was so excited!! Finally done raising kids, but the first few months were hard. She had seconds thoughts, even couldn’t sleep well the first couple of weeks. But she loves it now. Love, loves it. Your mom will adjust. This is normal.

  3. Everything has a way of working out. It is overwhelming when there is so much unpacking to be done. Maybe your Mom can donate some clothes and things she doesn’t need to a women’s shelter. It sounds like she has too many clothes. Which i do too. I am going to donate some coats that no longer fit me. And will have more room. I love her new place and think she will too once she is settled. Plus she really had been at her other house for a long time. Sometimes people miss houses after they sell them. I didn’t but my husband did. It was our first home and he had painted and done a lot of work to the yard and house over the years.
    i had the heating pad on my neck and shoulder last night. But feel some better today.
    I have a load of laundry and still need to decorate for Christmas. We did get the tree up yesterday. I may make a meatloaf for supper. Enjoy your day.

    • Yes I feel bad we can’t decorate there already like we are here but we have time I think. I’ll focus on trying to help more again when we are back from our trip. She is giving me clothes to send to Thred Up – and I get credit and can buy clothes in return- nice of her to let me do that. Anything without tags Will go in yard sale for spring. Yes I know she loves the new place and she likes to be organized and so many things are missing- well in some box. We will get there. She seemed to be having a good day today working in the house.

  4. Your mom will settle in slowly at her own pace. I think when she made the comment on FB, it was out of frustration & exhaustion. I know how hard this has been on you & George but her world is the most unsettled. Unfortunately, I don’t think she realizes or appreciates your turmoil. She’s focused on herself. I really think once she’s settled she’ll be happy. And when it’s time for assisted living, that move should go smoother. 🙏
    I just finished putting all my Fall decor “stuff” away. I had company the past couple of weekends, so I wanted to leave it up. Now I need to do a good cleaning again before Christmas takes stage.
    I know how much you miss your doggies. 😥 You will find some doggies that will steal your heart & keep you company. You will & that’s exciting. Something to look forward to.
    Take care of yourself!!

    • Thank you 🙏 for your thoughts today. I know she is frustrated. There is a roadblock to everything we try to do it seems. George got the TV hooked up today but the Roku not working. lol Oh well. I love the fall to Christmas changeover. But I get an anxious a bit trying to find time to cram it in. I like to enjoy it and be creative and in the spirit. So far it’s going well but had to go to Walmart twice for lights for the tree. Ahhh. Time for glass of wine! Hope your decorating going well. I wish you blogged! :> )

  5. Hi Sonya, I’m really late in getting my comment in…You ask what we might be doing, well as usual not very much !! However I did get a start on the Christmas cards. Unfortunately I didn’t get very far. I usually enjoy sitting writing with Christmas music playing in the background but for some reason the TV was on and Mary was enjoying a Christmas film so I just left it on. I had only got as far as the Ds when my fingers kept locking and I realised I just had to stop it was too painful So I realise I’m going to have to just take my time and try to just do a few each day as and when I’ve got time. What with one neighbour coming in at 10.30 for coffee most days and she dosn’t leave till nearly mid day. Then old Muriel coming to play mahjong at 2.15-3.45. There’s not much time left in my day. As I have to do Mary’s as well I like her to be here and to feel a bit useful by putting on stamps and closing envelopes, otherwise I might do them in the evening….Ah well it will get done in time I’m sure. I’m glad you’ve got your list of to do for this week. I’m glad your not going to be at Mums beck and call it’s not good for you or for her. You mustn’t feel in the least bit guilty if you don’t go see to her every whim …it’s time you began to put George and yourself first you’ve spent almost the whole year getting Mum settled …’s 9.30 pm over here and as I’m so tired tonight I’m actually half way to bed. So I’m going to say Night Night. God Bless….

    • You are right. Mom has to be able to get up and do about herself as it’s what she wanted. We will check in every few days but I do need to get in some of her orders as some are safety issues like bath tub mat. But I think we may as well do it when we get back as we can’t have packages on the porch while we are gone. Although neighbors wouldn’t mind holding them for us. Hope you get the cards done! I got tired doing ours too. I sent out around 40 I think. I may have to cut back. I’m stopping to rest after being on feet all day but need to get back at it. Will blog tomorrow the results!

Leave a Reply

%d bloggers like this: