Managing Life with Grace and Ease….or Maybe NOT!

Ahhhh yes, the week progresses and Friday is here at last. It’s hard to describe this week. Despite my trying to keep positive and keep grasping at “happy”, I can feel this tug downward. I think I go through this EVERY year about this time. The days have been dark and dreary, if sunny at all they have been cold. The sleep on the minimal side as well – and does not help AT ALL. I try to look forward to things, but find I just trend downward in my mood. Are any of you doing this too? I have not lost hope though. I keep grasping and finding myself on middle ground somehow. And the fact that it is Friday helps a lot to keep my chin up, and while the rosy glasses are still around here somewhere -I’m looking for them, the dark glasses are not being worn just yet. I have on the light grey fuzzy pair, the white cloudy ones that keep the future out – the ones that can’t see past winter.

I feel like I’m way behind on everything I want to do here at home, but yet where is the hurry or the WHY behind the hurry? It’ll happen when it does. And yet all the things I’ve talked about for months I can finally do this weekend, so at least that is progress.

Christmas, the Texas trip, Year End, all threw me behind a bit. That’s ok. Those were important, Christmas and Texas was fun and the Year End necessary. This week I’ve enjoyed working less – leaving on a better schedule (leaving on time) and that has made the evenings a bit more restful and made a few evening projects possible. Such projects this week: getting through the remaining 800 emails and doing my nails and watching a couple of YouTubers that I’m behind on.

As far as work goes? Well, I am down to only one state of reporting w-2’s and that state gives you until the end of February. So I’ve made progress already in my “February” processing of things. This last state left is one of the bigger projects with its requirement of entering – I think it’s like 188 or so w-2’s manually as for some reason we don’t have what it takes to do a file upload. It may be more than 188 but it’s something like that. I’m breaking them up into like groups of 20 and at least you can SAVE it. So I’ll do a few at a time and take breaks. Once that is finished my year end projects are over. And there is a LOT to catch up on after that. I have to box up some cabinets for storage pick up, move over some 2020 files to make room for 2021, and yes – believe it or not – start preparing for the next quarter, making worksheets, make payroll labels and so forth. Lots to work on there. Before long – just a few weeks and it’ll be quarter end again. And I have a couple of month ends too before then.

Watching Yellowstone Series

Photo from CANVA, Yellowstone area

We’ve been watching “Yellowstone” some this week and we only have ONE show left in season 3. I wonder if there will be another season. I hope so. We’ve really enjoyed this show. We wanted to watch the final one last night but we watched two shows last night and it was time to go to bed.

Bedtime Decisions

Speaking of BED. Roger began whimpering at 10:00 p.m. starting the disturbances way earlier than normal and waking me up just after being asleep for half an hour. Without even hesitating, I grabbed my pillows, and favorite warm throw, and took them with me to the guest bedroom (my beach bedroom), for a night of better sleep. This pic below is just a canned photo from Pexels through WordPress, but I do like the pic!

Photo by Taryn Elliott on Pexels.com

After several nights in a row of spotty sleep, I decided that last night I’d do myself a favor and just move. And that decision was on a whim, but likely a good one for a time. While I cannot claim that I got MORE sleep, I can say that the sleep I had between wake up sessions was a deeper and more restful sleep. I woke up a few times between 1:30 and 4:00 hearing Roger’s whimpers and putting him back in bed, from where George had taken care of the opposite and put him down from the bed. I think it’s worth it to maybe move into the guest bedroom for a while. Maybe we can both get some rest that way. I could still hear snoring but it was not as loud as it was not right in my ear, and I wasn’t having to deal with BOTH dog waking me up as well as snores.

Once I’m awake around 1:30 my night is pretty much shot from there and I sleep light the rest of the night. Dog whimpers and snoring make me wake up repeatedly IF I get the luxury of going back to sleep in our bed. And worse, is when I’m in a deep sleep and get woken up – and my dreams are weird and all that, plus the drowsiness you feel all day from being woken up in a deep sleep. I am just so tired of it all and at wit’s end. I even have wanted to go stay in a hotel for a night or two to just catch up on sleep. But I’m getting to where I cannot function properly from lack of sleep now. I need sleep – whatever it takes. So it’s time. Roger will have to just stay down from the bed. I’m going to put the sound machine on in the guest bedroom and hopefully it will drown it out. It’s just all so sad. I hate to hear him whine but we have to have sleep.

The Dreams

I like remembering the dreams – even if they are odd – but they are definitely weird. Like adventurous weird. I’m always traveling somewhere, going somewhere, with a big group usually, most of whom I do not know- but sometimes I lose my purse. I hate that one. I think that dream happens when life is unorganized and untidy and chaotic, and I start to feel anxious about it. I no longer dream much about work now that I’ve moved from HR. I used to have chaotic work dreams during my HR Career. Some seemed prophetic. I once dreamed I walked into a bathroom stall and there was a person (coworker) sitting on the toilet. Who dreams that??? I do for some reason. I mean YUK! The next week this person was “flushed from our system” and no longer working with us. Things like that happen a lot.

Like one night this week in my dreams I flew around (that part was really fun) and landed in some strange folks kitchen at a family gathering and was just like “well hello, how ya’ll been?” What???? lol The flying around was fun of course. But what weird dreams. I remember in my dream thinking “wow, this is great I want to keep going and I flew until I saw something interesting, which was someone cooking dinner in their kitchen – how appropriate is that? It may sound like a weird dream but that is SOO me to stop flying to go eat! LOL

Photo by Free Nature Stock on Pexels.com

So last night’s “no brainer” decision was a good one I think. I’m going to sleep in there for a while and see if it doesn’t help me out. No doubt I also keep George awake some when I’m in bed as I toss and turn so much. We’ll see how it goes. It’s kinda sad in a way and I’ve said NO to moving to the other bedroom for weeks. But I’m going to do it now and see if it doesn’t help, or at least until Roger is no longer with us. I just can’t do this anymore of the up and downs all night and no sleep. I think Roger is just going to have to whine and our sound machines will have to drown him out. Doggie Alzheimers and he just doesn’t want to do anything but drink water and pee, drink water and pee, and then finally sleep while we are awake. It’s not my decision to make as far as “when it’s time”. It’s George’s decision as it’s his buddy dog. Does Roger still have joy? Yes. Does he have pain? Not actively showing signs of pain. Is he struggling? Yes. Are his systems failing? Likely yes, in the stages of it.

These times are tough. But it’s Friday! Yes it is. We will hold on to that and get through the day with our Friday tasks and our w-2 reporting. And we will come home and dive into the weekend projects. All those projects that I have talked about since October! I won’t list them for the 40th or 60th time. But I will come back in and let you know how things are progressing!

Happy Sleeps to all! And Happy Friday as well. Will Spring ever get here? I’m so ready for it. But we have colder temps coming ahead! I’ve not really checked the weather much but I heard we have a cold trend coming. I’m so dang tired of being COLD! OK it will get better! I’ll find the Rosy Glasses and it’ll all be ok.

5 responses to “Friday, Sleeping in the Guest Room, and Battling the Blues”

  1. Betty Avatar

    A good night’s sleep is very critical for anything! Good luck, and I hope it gets better!

    1. Backporchwriter Avatar

      Thank you! Me too.

  2. Lauren Avatar
    Lauren

    I understand how you feel. Sleep affects everything. Roger may have his days and nights mixed up. He gets bored and snoozes all day while you guys are working. Then at night he wants attention and to stay awake. And you suffer and have a bad night. I know I am a light sleeper and don’t get good deep sleep until early in the morning. Other than wearing earplugs I don’t know how you could block out sounds. I would have to move to another room too. It is important for your health to get your sleep. Plus driving to work after a sleepless night is not good.

  3. Sybil Avatar
    Sybil

    I think you do usually have the blues around this time of the year, I remember reading about how you feel most years…but this to will pass love and as an old gentleman said over here. Tomorrow will be a good day…….you just have to look for it and not let the dark clouds overtake you. I would hope that your night in the spare bed will help you. Not sure if it will help George. How does he cope with so little sleep and all the interruptions ? It may soon be time for a real serious talk with the two of you about Rogers future as well as you and George’s…..now I have to go…dinner is ready we are having the remains of the chicken from yesterday and I made some potatoe scones instead of plain old potatoes or chips,,,,they came out quite good but not as good as I had hoped….but thankfully it’s just Mary and I today. Our forecast is for VERY COLD WEATHER on the horizon with the probability of thick snow Night night. God Bless

    1. Backporchwriter Avatar

      Enjoy watching the snow!

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