Vacation Emotions

We have had a good week getting organized for the next week ahead. And have organized everything that we can until it’s time to head out. House sitters set, security cams set, and so forth. Also lucky to have neighbors that keep a close eye on things and one has agreed to hang out and also take care of Little Bit – the cat. I love having our Nest too where we can see what is going on. Peace of mind.

And getting things ready for work so the person doing payroll has everything they need for a successful payroll run. That said, today will be extremely busy doing today’s things and as much of tomorrow’s as I can. I have spent a majority of my week feeling guilty about going on vacation and then when I really step back and analyze it, I ask myself why would I feel guilty about taking much earned and deserved vacation time spent with family? Then at that point I get mad at myself over the fact that I feel guilty considering all the hours of my personal time that I sacrificed in the last few months. I remember at that point (as one thought always leads to another) that EVERY time I do this it is NEVER convenient. It is a growing but smaller company in the big scheme of things with much of us in the office busting at the seams with responsibility (some have extra help and some don’t- payroll does not) and so it’s just never convenient for anyone to be off. A day here and there squeaks by and is recovered quickly – two – eh – it’s doable but when you start taking 3 or more days off – especially in conjunction with a holiday – it’s not only inconveniencing yourself but others too and the impact of that just implodes. So…yeah…here I sit going through all these emotions. And I’m so appreciative that I was approved to go, regardless of the hardship. And absolutely adore the person that is making this possible for me, and no doubt getting a hard time because of it. But in the wee small hours of the morning when you wake up and go through all these thoughts you realize that…….at the end of the day, my family and my daughter is NOT replaceable. We live states apart. We rarely get to spend time together unless we sacrifice time and expense. One is easier than the other, but neither ideal. George and I hardly ever get time to go anywhere together anymore outside our area. And to be quite honest this was planned very early in the year when we pondered this date so that it WOULD be over the holidays and everyone partially off already – thinking it would be less of a burden to be off fewer days rather than more days. Go figure. See, it’s just never convenient for anyone to be gone regardless of a short week or a long week. Yes jobs changed. Still early on this was arranged and approved. And we are elated. WE will enjoy the time together. It is a difficulty not just for others but for me as well as I get to work twice the week next week – long hours and crazy long hours for much of Dec and January. And in reality, NO time is ever a good time so I have decided it IS what it IS and to not feel guilty anymore. I am questioning why this is even a pattern with me? And why I go through these emotions in the first place when it’s been assigned, planned, and approved. I never used to do this before. And I am not going to let anyone make me feel guilty either. Done. Bam. Grateful. We are going. We are off and gone in the morning – bright and early hoping to escape as much of the Nashville traffic as we can and it’s probably going to be a rainy travel day. And there is one dang thing for sure – I won’t have to review resumes while I am gone. lol (Remembering vacations in the past couple of years that were not really vacations as I sat working in the background over emails and keeping the work flow going instead of getting to listen to the conferences I paid good money for). Ok my guilt is feeling much better now after I think/write all this through. I’m going to take the time and enjoy it. It’s been a long tough year and we deserve it and we’ll end up working twice over to make up for the time and work missed -so no more guilt for me.

All that said – PLEASE say a prayer for us now while you are reading this – over travel safety. It is a total of maybe 13 or 14 hours? Some of it in possible heavy rain? Broken up with a stay in Hot Springs each way. I will try to post as often as I can. I’m taking my laptop so I can blog and shop.

Oh I finally got the dogs a trim set up for February. We have one in Dec but you have to set them up months in advance to get a Saturday.

The new planner I bought is working great. I absolutely love everything about it. It fits in my back pack and is flexible, and works great to use for work and personal both since life seems to be a big ole blend of time with not many lines of separation b/w the two. So why not have the calendar for both. Not two separate ones.

And I guess I will end here soon. But I do want to say that I am looking forward to this week and also looking forward to the things we will do when we get back. It will be a harried time getting fall decor up and Christmas decor out and finishing the shopping and the wrapping with a heavy work load upcoming and no more vacay days to get anything done with. I’ll be catching up from being off too – you know, you don’t ever really get the days off free and clear- you work the hours double time when you get back, lol. Anyway I’ll have a lot of weekend work coming up in the holidays and then I hear that January is bad (month end, quarter end, and year end hitting all the same time). So I will enjoy the week guilt free. When vacay is over, both work and our personal time will be busy as well and the two will have to fight it out to get things done across the board. Work will win as it’s never a balance b/w work and personal anyway, since man’s fall from God’s grace and the curse of having to work instead of living in paradise. Although God has a plan for our salvation, it didn’t remove the work curse, lol. Work always gets the best and creative part of your day, the most of your day and week and personal time is meant to be an afterthought that has to fight to get through. So it helps if you love what you do. And that is why I switched jobs, because I do love what I do now. And I’m going to love the time off that we are given and not feel guilty over it because it is long over due after all we have been through to get to this point. So… WEEEEEEE Doggies! Here we go!

11 responses to “Vacation Emotions”

  1. Prayers to all for safe travels!

    I’ve worked at my job for 24 and a half years. I have zero guilt. I’ll never have guilt again. I believe we all are replaceable no matter how good of a worker we are so why let the job get me down? Nope never again. I used to feel very differently.
    You’re a good worker but go enjoy every second of seeing KATY! How wonderful it is that you and George can go!
    Much love to you.

  2. I hope you have wonderful Thanksgiving vacay and will be praying for safe travels for you no reason to feel guilty you do deserve your time off family is very important!

  3. I hope you have wonderful Thanksgiving vacay and will be praying for safe travels for you no reason to feel guilty you do deserve your time off family is very important! Happy thanksgiving vacay❣️

  4. I hope you have wonderful Thanksgiving vacay and will be praying for safe travels for you no reason to feel guilty you do deserve your time off family is very important! Happy thanksgiving vacay❣️Relax and enjoy!!!

  5. Life is short. Enjoy your trip. After all, you have been through with your job you have earned it and more.

  6. You’re ahead of the game with having only last minute things to do before you leave. You can relax and enjoy your vacation and time with your family. Prayers for a safe trip.

  7. Praying you have a safe trip and enjoy your time with your children forget about your I know it’s hard to do sometimes.

  8. Enjoy your time with Katy and Cody. Give them a hug for us. Do not agonize over work. I worked for a company once where one of the main ladies would remark, if you drop dead on the floor, they will step over you and ask who can we get to do this job. So true. Your life comes first. Family and friends. This time of the year I am taking mandatory studies, getting my Federal id renewed, passing the federal test, passing the company test, etc. Have to do this every year before Jan. I use to feel guilty when I would take off, not anymore. As I told my supervisor the other day, if I feel I need it, I will call you first before I take off. In our system I can go in up to two weeks prior and change my availability. They then have to respond to these request. Of course, never a problem with an emergency, you just let them know and they get you covered. But don’t cry wolf or you will not have a spot to come back to. But of course, I work three and half months, study two and have the rest of the year off. Love you both and have a safe trip.

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